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We’ve all had an ex that we can’t get out of our minds. A harmful friendship we hold on to even though it exhausts us. Or even a family member who is toxic. Why can’t we learn how to let go of someone, even when we know they’re not good for us?  Holding on is […]
The post How to let go appeared first on tonyrobbins.com.

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/

Think of the most loyal person you know. The most creative. The most generous, individualistic or compassionate. We all have people in our lives who stand out in a particular way. There’s a reason for this. These people stand out for us because of their strong values. What are values? Where do they come from? […]
The post What are your personal values? appeared first on tonyrobbins.com.

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/

Personal growth is one of our deepest human needs. When we don’t commit to a personal growth plan, we stay stagnant or become trapped by our limiting beliefs. However, we can’t just say we want to grow and leave it at that. We need to set clear goals so that we can create an effective […]
The post Power through personal growth goals appeared first on tonyrobbins.com.

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/

Conflict is a part of life and relationships.  Though having less conflict is a good thing, having no conflict ever is not a realistic goal.
The question is whether you and your partner are behaving in ways that will encourage you to successfully navigate through to the other side.  An important part of this is having enough self awareness to be willing to hold a mirror up to yourself and own your role.  This can be tricky as it’s not always smooth.  But if you can begin by being aware of what unhealthy communication looks like, you may be more able to catch yourself doing things that aren’t helpful and even change course.
10 signs you don’t fight fair in your relationship

You name call or make character attacks.
You use global statements such as “always” or “never.”
You go off topic to a long list of other issues you are reminded of.
You weaponize your partner’s vulnerabilities.
You follow your partner around the house despite them saying they don’t want to talk about it now.
You suddenly leave when clearly angry, maybe even out the door.
You minimize or invalidate your partner’s feelings.
You bring in the supposed opinions of others who “agree” with you into the discussion.
Your defensiveness

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/

How well do you know yourself? It’s one thing to understand your opinions, likes and dislikes. But understanding your personality and all its nuances is another ball game altogether. Oftentimes insight is restricted by self-perception and limiting beliefs, so to develop true self-awareness, you must get an objective perspective on yourself.  Tony Robbins’ DISC assessment […]
The post DISC personality types explained appeared first on tonyrobbins.com.

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/

The need to be perfect, perfectionism, can be a real challenge for people, impacting personal happiness and general well-being.  Perfectionistic behavior can also negatively impact relationships.  The problem is that there is often a real benefit to having your act together, being extremely detail oriented and seemingly able to do it all.  And you may get a lot of positive feedback from those around you that reinforces this behavior.  The reward system can be plentiful in this way.  However the long term consequences of constantly trying to live up to such a high bar can be significant not only your emotional health but your closest relationships.
The problem with perfectionism is it’s a set up.
Human beings are not created to do anything perfectly.  Human beings make mistakes.  So at some point the perfectionist will do the same and likely endure a lot of suffering as a result.  The drive to be perfect can be intense; high stress levels, anxiety or fear of NOT doing things perfectly and exhaustion.  It’s a set up because it’s not only unsustainable but can have further consequences:

Impact on your own happiness.  Perhaps you weaponize your drive to be perfect against yourself.
Impact on your relationships.  Maybe those

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/

The value of setting goals in life cannot be overstated. In the words of Tony Robbins, “Progress equals happiness.” We need to feel like we’re working toward a goal to ultimately feel fulfilled and joyful in life. But are all goals created equal? Not necessarily. The outcomes you want ultimately point to the quality of […]
The post Achieve more with SMART goals appeared first on tonyrobbins.com.

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/

Emotional safety is one of the most important elements of any happy and healthy relationship.  Yet there are so many ways it can be compromised.  Sometimes it happens inadvertently and other times it’s a more direct assault on the foundation of the relationship.
When a couple has a high level of emotional safety they usually have a number of things going for them simultaneously; they feel heard, understood, feel prioritized and trust each other.  They ultimately feel deeply loved, secure in the sense that they are there for each other through the twist and turns of life.  And they ideally feel relaxed in a way that they can live with authenticity together rather be someone other than who they are.
The more challenged couples with a lack of emotional safety demonstrate their distress in many ways that ultimately can lead to a slowly eroding relationship foundation and disconnection.  The longer the issues go unaddressed, the more difficult it can be to create the needed safety to reconnect, chronic tension and resentment having built up.
The reasons why people are challenged establishing emotional safety together are many and unique to their experiences.  It’s a complex topic that requires a willingness to look in the

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/

Anyone who has ever achieved something worthwhile has had challenges and setbacks – because anything that is worth doing is going to be difficult. Overcoming adversity is a necessary step on the road to greatness. Philosopher Edmund Burke said, “He that wrestles with us strengthens our nerves and sharpens our skill. Our antagonist is our […]
The post Learn how to overcome adversity appeared first on tonyrobbins.com.

Originally published at http://www.gottmanblog.com/