How S&M Can Strengthen Your Relationship
No, I am not referring to Fifty Shades of Grey sadism and masochism. I am talking about a seriously powerful, connection-building combo: self-compassion and mindfulness.
What does this look like? Self-compassion enables you to love yourself as you would love others. It also helps to ease your emotional and physical suffering. Mindfulness, on the other hand, relates to paying attention to the present moment – emotionally and physically – without judging yourself or others. It really is as simple as that!
Take for instance the current situation of Stacy and Peter (names changed for anonymity), a married couple from my private practice. They are parents to Lily, their beautiful, spirited, one-year-old girl. Although Stacy and Peter love each other and Lily very much, they both work long hours, which puts a strain on their relationship.
Exhausted from working all day, Stacy walks through the front door and has to start taking care of Lily. Peter, on the other hand, is out of town for work most days, making him unable to share in the bulk of Lily’s caretaking. As a result, Stacy feels frustrated and angry over Peter’s perceived lack of support. Every time she tries to talk to him about it,